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I Had An Existential Crisis When I Was Five & Man That Fucked Me Up

from Anonymous Cans Scare Me by Anonymous Cans Scare Me

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lyrics

i used to be afraid of insects
i hated things that would sting me when i went outside
as i got older i had to get over it
because i had paychecks on the line

and i was never a big fan of needle
and whatever they would pump into me
but as i learned of the good that they were engineered to do
i got over myself and let it be

and i used to dislike public speaking
which seems ironic looking back
i would shake when i performed for others
afraid that i might make them laugh

and i used to be afraid of dying
i learned that we all die when i was just a boy
and my mother told me we all go to heaven
but thinking i wouldn’t make it in it scared me half to death

well i’m still afraid of things that go bump in the night
and when people learn to just shug it off
like oh it’s just the cat, or it’s just the dog
it could be that drunk driver who just crashed in our front yard

and now i’m afraid of large commitments
and the thought of my friendships all falling apart
because all of my friends always move on
find other people and leave me in the dust

and i’m afraid that i’ll endure heartbreak again
two times by you is enough for me
i don’t want to imagine how it feels now
it hurt so bad when i was seventeen

and fuck i’m still afraid of dying
because i know it’s all that i am guaranteed
there are some nights that i just can’t fall asleep
because i don’t know what will happen to me

and all of this makes me afraid of living
and going about my life from day to day
i just know that this is all unavoidable
so i guess that makes it all okay

credits

from Anonymous Cans Scare Me, released April 17, 2016

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Anonymous Cans Scare Me Beverly, Massachusetts

John, Lav and Jackson.

2015-2016

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